The Irish are drinking and smoking less, as austerity measures bite - much to the chagrin of the tabacco companies and SOFT drinks manufacturers

No, the headline is not wrong. The Irish are drinking less than they did before. But it's not the Guinness that's suffering. No, the black stuff is still flowing. Its the soft drinks industry that's suffering.

Britvic, who produce Ballygowan, Club soft drinks, Pepsi and other brands for the Irish market is feeling the pinch. Sales are down across the board by nearly 9% on the past year resulting in a significant drop in profits. The company is planning to reduce its 800 strong workforce by 160 as a result.

Meanwhile cigerette smoking is following Britvic in the market. PJ Carroll reports a 60% reduction in profits on a market reported to consists 4.5 billion cigerettes in the year - down from 5.1bn. That seems like an awful lot of cigerettes for the size of the populations - yet the company believes there is an additional substantial grey or black market.

Rumours abound that the government is handing our cigerettes to farmers for their cattle and pigs on the back of EU subsidies. Scientists report that the incidence of tabacco adiction in farm animals in Ireland is increasing.

It used to be an issue with pigs feeding on cigerette butts (improves their digestion and reduces greenhouse gases) but now more and more animals are chewing tabacco and there are signs of major increase in mouth cancer in cows and pigs in particular.

Now where did I leave my bottle of Jemesons? I could have sworn I saw my great grandmother , Mary, passing the window just now - and I'm on the fourth floor!